Are You Ready to be a Father?

So any day now I could be a father.  In honor of Kung Pao’s impending arrival, Mel and I decided to eat some Kung Pao Chicken for dinner. It only seemed appropriate, don’t you think? Maybe a little twisted in a “we’re eating our own baby” sort of way.

Don’t worry, we wouldn’t ever actually eat our own baby, although I have been teasing Mel about how we should eat the placenta.

I like to dance around the living room singing “Boil it, Mash it, Stick it in a Stew.”

She doesn’t like it.

No offense to anyone out there who did decide to eat the placenta (or save it, or plant a tree on it, etc.) I’ve been told some people do that. Whatevs, you know? Hell, I eat Cheetos, and that’s pretty questionable judgement, too.

Anyway, speaking of birthing, Huzzah! New question in the inbox! This one comes from my friend Liz:

What have you learned about birth from your online birthing class that you didn’t know before? Are you glad you took the course? And are you scared/excited/nervous for the actual event?

As Liz points out, Mel and I decided not to taking a formal birthing class. Instead, we opted to read the article on birthing. Mostly, I think I learned that is not a very reliable source of information. This article was terrible, and the lady that wrote it was a total hippy. But I did learn that (according to my primary responsibility during the birth process is to offer Mel massages. I’m gonna see if I can swap that around and get her to give me a few massages while we’re at the hospital.

But I am mostly an emotional pendulum, swinging back and forth between terrified and giddy excited. Oddly enough, I have been totally craving listening to Ace of Base recently, which I’m gonna go ahead and blame on Kung Pao since I don’t have any other good explanation. When it comes to parenting, I really have no idea what to expect, so here goes nothing.

Any more Questions?
Ask Me Anything!!

7 comments to Are You Ready to be a Father?

  • Wierd. Mrs S listened to Ace of Base non-stop through the last 3 months of her second pregnancy. It was new then, but still…

  • Von

    Wow. While it would be nice if you could actually get to Mel’s back while she’s in labor, mostly your job will be to hold a leg – if she’s having this baby in a hospital. Otherwise you could be like my friend: have your kid at home and while your wife is on her hands and knees on the dog bed, catch the baby. So much more exciting than drugs and a hospital right?

  • My main responsibility was to ensure that the hospital staff was treating my wife the way they were supposed to be. You know instead of having her be in extreme pain even though she had an epidural and telling the nurse that was annoying the shit out of her to stay out of the room–going so far as me having to tell the supervisor that if she came in there again my wife was likely to kill her.

  • Aliecat

    Eating the placenta is called “Placentophagy.” The word alone gives me the creeps, let alone the actual act.

  • Fact: some people have the placenta dried and made into a “teddy bear.”

  • Paul

    Sauteing, grilling, boiling are all disgusting but conceptually understandable. Microwaving? NO, NO!

  • FYI – we did NOT eat the placenta. And frankly, after Claire was born, and I saw the placenta (which looked just like a metal pan of bloody guts) the thought of eating it almost made me barf.