I’m Pretty Sure I’m an Old Man

I’ve never been particularly tech-savvy, but I’ve always considered myself at least average – and able to learn quickly. But lately I’ve become pretty convinced that I’m an old man and that I’m horribly behind the times when it comes to technology.
My newest challenge is cell phones. After two years of marriage, my wife and I are thinking we should get a family plan. Also, my current phone is nearly 3 years old – and it was used when I bought it off craigslist. It’s been dropped a few too many times (including a spectacular toss against the wall last night as I tumbled up the stairs in an embarrassingly awkward fashion) and for the past several months it has only worked in speakerphone mode – which is a little inconvenient. So I’m in the market for a new cell phone & contract for the wife and I. I suspect I should consider pre-paid options since I use a max of 150 minutes per month, but that’s for losers, right?
I see a lot of commercials by AT&T & Verizon about 3G networks and such – and I’m a little embarrassed to admit that I have no idea what that means or why I would want it. And what’s with all these new-fangled data plans? I have to pay, like, $30 PER LINE for data access? So my wife and I will be spending an extra $60/month (on top of normal monthy fees ($60-80) just so we can check our email and use apps (whatever those are…)???? Seriously? So for all you married folk out there with data plans, y’all are paying, like, $120+ per month for your cell plans? Really? Sheesh.
I’m tempted to buy us a couple of droids, but I suspect I wouldn’t really know how to use it – and that I’d be better served by a Spongebob phone intended for 4-year-olds. I don’t even know how to use all the features on the phone I’ve got now (except speakerphone – I’ve mastered that one…). Plus, I’m gonna be honest – most of the apps I hear people talking about just sound stupid. My brother showed me an app that let his phone make farting noises. It was pretty entertaining, I’ll admit, but I don’t think it’s something I’m willing to pay $60/month for. I probably couldn’t figure it out anyway.
Anyway, I gotta go trim my ear hair and eyebrows.

8 comments to I’m Pretty Sure I’m an Old Man

  • Moe

    I've gotten to the point where I couldn't imagine not having data on my phone. It is expensive, so we canceled cable to cover the costs. I started with an iPod Touch, so I was able to use a lot of iPhone apps on that using wifi for just the cost of the iPod and the minimal charge for the app.

    That just got me addicted and I wanted it mobile, so I bought a Palm Pre with my Sprint plan. It's a little cheaper than an iPhone plan, and I was stuck on Sprint for my work discount. So I "only" pay $60/mo for a plan with data included.

  • Anonymous

    See if you can get a work discount through a certain provider, then work with that provider. Cancel your home phone if you have a home line, and switch to cell phone only.

  • Kat

    Really, it's that much for a family plan?! I'm a little embarrassed to say that we are both on our individual family plans still and we just send some money home each month for it, but we are not paying nearly that much. I don't have a data plan though and Mark is still on Edge which is slower but cheaper than 3G.

  • Sarah

    HAHAHA! You are too funny! You would get along great with my husband, who is not tech saavy at all and says he has a "Sesame Street" computer with really big buttons that works better than any of my computers. 🙂

    Good luck on the hunt!

  • Moe, $60/month doesn't sound too bad….

    Anonymous, the prices I quoted were the cheapest T-Mobile plans I could find – that turns out a little better than after the 18% discount I get at verizon. I've been land-line free for several years.

    Kat – see if you can keep that going for a while – start skipping months and see if your parents forget to come asking for the money.

    Sarah, sounds like my kind of guy.

  • A Spongebob phone, huh? Hilarious. Actually, I think anything with a Spongebob reference is hilarious.

    I can't believe the price of data plans either, and I can't picture myself ever getting one.

    3G? Everyone's heard the term, everyone knows that it's something one of the mobile phone companies like to brag about and that it means faster mobile internet… and I think that's about it. I'd be shocked if more than 1% of the population knew more than that.

  • Haha… ear hair and eyebrows! You talking about dropping your phone reminds me of the time I willingly threw my phone off your 3rd story balcony onto pavement just to prove how hardcore my phone was! It still worked after that. In fact, if I charged up the battery and added in a SIM card, it would probably still work!

  • Ren

    Given your emphasis on lack of tech skills and maxing out at 150 minutes per month I recommend a JITTERBUG! It's got big buttons based on the tv ads and since it's made for old people (read: they've fallen and can't get up), it might withstand your tumbles well.

    As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord Blackberry of Verizon.